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On Turning Four

In the end, it finally all seems to have been a dream. Only the things written down have any gravity to them. The other things are ready to disappear.  -James Salter I launched my first blog post four years ago today. The summer of miracles—that’s how I will always remember it—the summer my mother’s death sentence got turned on its side. Astonishingly, that summer, she rocketed out of her sick bed and for a time, jumped right back into living her life. It felt right to me then to pay homage to her here, to share pieces of her...

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The Final Approach

Life is short.  I have carried this oft-articulated mantra in my heart for more years than I can remember, having experienced the gravity of its true meaning when my dad died suddenly, in mid-life. Sadly, last week, those old familiar words bubbled up to the surface once more, making their gravity felt.  A friend of mine— a beautiful soul with a fearless spirit—lost her battle to cancer. She was only 48. Carrie was an accomplished writer and market strategist who reveled in being a wife and mother to her two young children. As I gazed into the eyes of her...

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One Year Bows To The Next

“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language and next year’s word’s await another voice.” ~T.S. Eliot It is difficult to fathom that it is nearly over—this year of spectacular highs and devastating lows—but truth is like that sometimes. One year ago today we sat in my mother’s living room— a rally of the troops—surrounding her with our love, admiration, and support— an attempt to shield her from what was to come. As we raised our glasses to toast the New Year, we made our proclamation: Life will be Heaven in 2011— enjoy every moment. We could not have...

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A Necessary Leaving

Now it is I who has done the leaving. Not in the forever way my mother left. No, nothing so gut wrenching as that. My leaving is only temporary and promises an eventual return. A necessary leaving… that’s what I would call it; a respite in which to regroup after many months of heavy lifting; a change of scene; a badly needed break; a time to recharge; a good idea. But, though it sounded like a good idea, I never anticipated the depth of finality my leaving would elicit; hadn’t foreseen that navigating this landscape of grief would require...

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